I've been spending far too much time alone the last few days. Last night a couple girlfriends and I went out to Elements, this hoity toity, snooty patooty place.
It wasn't my first choice, but hey, it was going out.
Met up with Andy (Andrea) at 6, and the first thing she tells me is that she's going surfing tomorrow, so she can only have a couple of drinks.
Now people. I put on a dress. I put on make-up. I actually put in my contacts, which is a time consuming event. I looked good. Pretty darn good actually.
And it was still happy hour, and she's saying she's already eaten dinner, and doesn't want to drink too much and wants to go to bed early.
Then Thea shows up. She looks great. I can tell she took some time to get ready, so I'm thinking, okay, this'll be fine.
But no. She's got a date at 8 o'clock. Yep. Seems she's got a new bloke and they're going to have dinner and "exchange gifts." I don't know if that's code for knocking boots, but I realize it doesn't involve me tagging along.
I'm cursed I tell you, cursed. I don't live in a place where going to a bar alone is a fun or exciting event. Oh yeah, once or twice in my younger days I did it, but it usually means running into someone I know (and this time of year, lots of folks back in town for the holiday), and having them give me a look of pity once they talk to me and find out 1) I'm still single, and 2) I'm out in a bar alone.
I ordered a Firetini, this FABULOUS drink with Habernero vodka and passionfruit puree, and a blue cheese hamburger with more peppers and onions on it. I figured if my social life wasn't too spicy, at least my gastronomical choices could be. We were at the bar, and two handsome men came in and sat next to us, on my side.
The girls started nudging me. The guys couldn't be less interested in the three of us. Well, I suppose they could be less interested, I mean, if we weren't there.
New Year's Eve came up. I told them I was planning to go camping. Protests. I should go out with them. Get all dressed up, and go to the bar we went to last year.
Now, we all know that 40 is supposed to be the new 30, which means I'm really only 32... however.
Being single, when most of my friends... nay, 95% of my friends are married, in a relationship, or dating, is a bit of a challenge. Not impossible, and I'm not one of those people who mind that much being the fifth wheel. I'm much more upset when I'm left out than when I'm the odd man (woman?) out. A good chunk of my friends are also 10-12 years younger than I am. Again not a problem, except I am not all that attractive to men 10-12 years younger than I am.
And then, of course, I get into this stupid, "Why am I still single?" mode that's boring, self-indulgent, and really, has no answer.
Gah.
To top it all off, after my exotic food and drink adventure? Worst case of heartburn I've ever had.
Oh yeah, I'm a catch all right.
4 comments:
Just stopped by your blog from Dickeybird's. I love your writing and I can really relate to this post. I don't mind either hanging out with all of my coupled friends, but sometimes I do feel like an outside.
Sounds like you need new avenues for meeting people.
Are you a member of a gym? Are there interest/hobby groups in your area that you can get involved with?
I know you've done the speed dating thing and hated that. I haven't heard good things about online dating services, but I've never tried them myself. I've met most of my friends through other friends or through the internet. I met my partner of 13 years at a bar through another friend.
To quote Dory from the movie 'Finding Nemo,' "Keep on swimming, swimming, swimming..." Eventually you will find your significant other. You just have to keep looking.
Move here and you can hang out with me and hubby. We are boring but could always use someone new to talk to! I agree with doug. Keep swimming. He's out there.
Gurl you got brass! What you need is a couple of queens thrown into that mix and that's a party. I've always known that women dress to impress one another, but this is proof. I [being raised by 3 gals] always compliment my ladies knowing that if I miss something I will not hear the good dirt around the table that evening ;)
Cheers,
kb
p.s. got to get yourself some pepcid sweetness and then eat to your hearts content.
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