I posted something last night, then erased it before most people could see what a pathetic whiner I was.
Why is it we are so ashamed of our sadness or anger? We don't want anyone to think we are feeling sorry for ourselves. Feeling sorry for ourselves is a sin somehow. "Chin up, don't cry, you've got it good. Lots of people have it worse than you."
Did you ever talk to someone about something that was troubling you, and you heard, "You think you've got problems, wait until you hear what I've been going through," or something to that effect?
So it's sort of don't talk about anything that upsets you, but if you do, someone's going to compete with you in the annoyance/sadness/anger division.
Why is that?
And then there's the responsibility factor. Sometimes our pain, sorrow, whatever, is caused by something other than ourselves. Someone other than ourselves. Now, if we hate that other someone, we can talk about how wronged we were, or how hurt we were until the cows come home (I'm wondering, where is the place the cows go from which they must return home?).
But, if we are still friends with that someone, well, can't we just "drop it" or "get over it?" And even if we aren't over it, we aren't to talk about it because it's happened, nothing can change that, and really, it makes the other person feel guilty.
So once again, we stifle it down. Keep it quiet, make nice, pretend it's not there.
But it is there.
And it comes out in stupid posts like the one I wrote last night.
Which hopefully got deleted before anyone I know saw it.
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5 comments:
When you delete a post, don't mention you've done so. Flagging your deletion merely encourages curious readers to use one of the RSS aggregators (like Bloglines) to go back and find your now-deleted but still retrievable post.
And probably you should include a Yahoo Mail or Gmail address on your blog page so that if people want to let you know about something like this, they don't have to do so publicly.
oh my goodness. If anyone out there is bored enough to go to all that trouble to read the 3-glasses-of-wine whining I did last night, they deserve to read it.
But thank you... it wasn't anything but me having a pity party for myself, but I'll keep this info for next time when I slip and let loose some really juicy stuff.
I love a good pity party and go to them every so often myself.
I try not to worry about blurting out my garbage...I am who I am, chin hairs and all.
Also, when I am whining, I love it when someone can say "Well, listen to my story, it's worse than yours!" because if it is, it makes me feel better and if it's not then I win.
I think I am sick. hahahha
I wish I was savvy enough to find that deleted post because my curiosity is piqued!!
I do that too.
I whine, and sometimes delete the post. Every once in a while is fine - it's good to express yourself, but if you find yourself complaining too often there's work to be done!
Not sure why we feel a need to put on a good face for the world. We all feel pain and sorrow, but for some reason we don't want to share it. This was a big part of being in group therapy for me, sharing my pain.
This may or may not help, but I feel your pain.
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